The highest goal Love Addiction treatment therapists can have for clients is to help them realise the solutions to their problems lie within, and to pass on tools to help guide them to those powerful inner answers. This blog attempts to do just that – to provide the tools you can use to help yourself out of love addiction and to address your relationship problems in a helpful, hopeful way.
Seeing a Love Addiction
I believe Love Addiction treatment shows us that it is our reliance on someone outside ourselves in an attempt to get our unmet needs fulfilled, to avoid fear or emotional pain, to solve problems and to maintain our balance. The paradox is that love addiction is our attempt to gain control of our lives, but we lose control by giving personal power to someone other than ourselves. It is often associated with feelings of ‘never having enough’ or ‘not being enough’. Love addiction is also a form of passivity: we do not directly resolve our own problems, but attempt to manipulate other so they will take care of us and thus take care of our problems.
Love Addiction treatment states that the roots of love addiction run deep and the way out is often long and rough. So long and rough, in fact, that you may be asking yourself: “Why bother? Isn’t any love better than no love at all?”
Why remove love addiction from your life? Because dependent love is limiting.
- It limits your ability to feel content.
- It limits your ability to function and to live up to your potential.
- It limits your openness to new experiences.
- It limits your ability to enjoy and live in the present.
- It limits your creative energy.
- It limits your personal power and you freedom.
- It limits your ability to accept others.
- It limits your willingness to face your fears.
- It limits your spontaneity.
- It limits your level of consciousness and your spiritual potential.
- It limits your capacity for intimacy and your ability to truly love.
Firstly when engaging in Love Addiction treatment, you must decide what choices you’ll make for your life. You surely do not have to change it, but if you decide to change, make sure you’re doing it for yourself. Once you make the decision to forgo addictive love, once you stop seeing life in melodramatic black and white and instead see it in true, complex colour, it may be difficult or impossible for you to retreat to your old – and perhaps easier – way of thinking. You’ll find you can invite – but not coerce – other in your life to come along with you. If they resist, you’ll do well to be patient and compassionate. You may even find your decision to give up addictive love means you’ll have to end your troublesome relationship, a decision which surely will cause you some natural, but survivable grief.
Fulfillment may not come easily; there are no guarantees your choice to change will bring instant happiness. Some who risk change grow into healthier love relationships, while others find they have to let go of a relationship and get a new start in life and love.
Once you decide to free yourself from love addiction, you agree to let go of your desire to be controlled or to control; you cease to manipulate others to get what you need and want. The urge to manipulate others is a powerful one and in giving it up you’ll experience some grief. But in the long run, such suffering will be far less than the pain you may have inflicted upon yourself or another in an addictive relationship.
This booklet is dedicated to those who are searching for healthier, happier love. Those of you who feel uncertain about how to proceed may want to experiment with the following exercises to see what you can learn about yourself. Those of you who wish, for whatever reasons of your own, to maintain the status quo in your troublesome relationship may want to stop here. You’re being honest, but remember, the decision against change is yours, so give up blaming others for your relationship troubles. Remember that you’ve relinquished personal power and growth in favour of love addiction. Some of you may doubt that most, if not all, love relationships harbour some elements of addiction. To you, I suggest doing the exercises before you decide it can’t be true.
Love addiction treatment often reveals that it all began in childhood where we learned to take care of ‘big people’ to keep them around for our survival. We needed them around to assure that we were taken care of. When they weren’t there for us, we made inadequate attempts to care for ourselves. Not one of us got everything we needed, when we needed it, or the way we wanted it. Unconsciously love addiction treatment shows us that we continue our search, feeling we must get this need met or we will die, get sick, go crazy or suffer unending pain. It is on this childlike level that we, as adults, unknowingly relate to people. Psychological addiction to other results from unfulfilled dependency needs. It is a reliance on someone else to meet our needs so as to avoid our deepest fears, attempt to solve our problems and maintain a sense of balance. To our unconscious minds love addiction makes perfect sense.
Our lives often reflect our unconscious beliefs. The exercises are based on the premises that all of who we are is not in our conscious awareness and that, becoming aware of our unconscious beliefs makes it possible for us to change.
Change = awareness + action. These love addiction treatment exercises are designed to increase self-awareness and motivate action. They are based on my experience in therapy and workshops; some are the results of my personal insights. Although all therapy basically is self-therapy, these exercises are usually done under professional guidance. If you find it difficult to use them on your own, or if – while moving through them – you find information or feelings that make you uncomfortable, don’t hesitate to seek professional support.
Love Addiction treatment tips
Here are seven basic steps that will help you out of love addiction:
- Awareness: admitting that love addiction plays a role in your life.
- Assessment: discovering the degree of your addiction.
- Decision: using your personal power to move from dependence to true love.
- Exploration: examining your personal fears, myths and history.
- Reprogramming: letting go of the old, embracing the new.
- Renewal: moving toward development of mature love relationships.
- Expansion: developing personal uniqueness and the ability to truly love yourself and others.
Love Addiction treatment shows that almost anything is treatable. Whether depression, anxiety, addiction or just simple stuckness. The very first step for Love Addiction treatment is awareness! The fact that you chose to read this blog, and perhaps have read other material on love addiction, indicates you already know your love relationship has aspects that just don’t feel right to you. Without such an admission, you might still be trapped in the denial stage, in which there is no fertile ground for the seeds of change to grow.
For more help with Love Addiction treatment and recognising your dependency problem and gaining control over it contact Pathways Wild Centre. We are here to help you grow, heal and enrich your life in all areas. Call 0824424779 or email firstname.lastname@example.org