When impulse controls you.

You have problems controlling your impulses if you act too quickly on your feelings. With addiction and impulse control, you constantly suffer negative consequences because you act without careful thought.  If you had stopped to think, you would not have gotten into all that trouble.  Maybe you ended in jail, struck someone you cared for or just got drunk.  This set of exercises is for those people who lose control over their behaviour.  It outlines the skills necessary to overcome problems with impulse control.

The first thing you have to understand about addiction and impulse control is that you are held accountable in our society only for what you do.  You are not held accountable for what you think or how you feel.  Your movements are what count.  That is what people see.  That is how people judge you.  You can think about robbing a bank all day long and you will not get arrested.  But if you rob a bank, then you have committed a crime and might be in big trouble.  To control your impulses, to get a hold on addiction and impulse control, you must learn to control your movements.

HOW TO UNDERSTAND YOUR FEELINGS

To control your impulses, you need to understand your feelings.  Feelings are impulses and feelings motivate action.  They are a powerful force.  The direct behaviour.  Each feeling is connected to a specific activity.  Let’s examine several feelings and the actions they stimulate.  There are only a few basic feelings.  Fear, anger and sadness are a few of them.  Fear motivates you to run, anger motivates you to fight and sadness motivates you to recover a lost object.  Examine each feeling and the movement to which it is attached.  Learn that each feeling motivates a specific action and learn what each feeling is and the action it initiates.

HOW TO DEVELOP GOALS

Now it is time to take a close look at exactly what you want to change.  Remembering that behaviour is movement, Question: take a piece of paper and detail exactly what you want to do differently.  For example, someone who physically abuses his or her spouse or kids would want to write down something like this:  “I want to stop hitting my spouse and children.”

Study each of your goals.  Is it reasonable that you can attain this goal?  Make sure that the goal is written in behavioural terms.  It needs to be a movement you can see, hear or feel. Learning about addiction and impulse control is a fascinating journey, one our patients at Pathways love to take. 

FEELINGS

All feelings are friendly, even the painful ones that lead us through addiction and impulse control issues.  They help us adapt to our environment and give us energy and direction for action.  The skill necessary for dealing with feelings appropriately is to learn exactly what coping skills to use when having a particular feeling.  Feelings should not be ignored; they should be acted on.  Which action to take is the skill you want to learn.  You need to spend some time with a few feelings and learn coping skills for dealing with these feelings.  Then you must practice the new skills until they become automatic.  You cannot just learn what to do.  You must practice the actual behaviour until it becomes second nature.  This will take a lot of time and practice.  Do not try to do this perfectly; just make progress!

addiction and impulse control

It is important to take a careful look at the consequence of your behaviour when looking at addiction and impulse control.  You will not learn from your actions unless you see clearly what happens when you act in a certain manner.  On another piece of paper, write briefly what happened each time you lost control of your actions.  Under each situation, write down the negative consequence that resulted from that loss of control.  This must be done in great detail.  Take a lot of time and think.  Do not blame anyone else for what happened.  Concentrate on your own actions.  Use every situation you can think of.  The more clearly you can see the negative consequence of your behaviour, the more you will tell yourself never to act that way again.  You can learn from your behaviour if you stop, think and plan before you act.

We have looked carefully at the behaviour you want to change that has led to addiction and impulse control.  We have studied the trigger, thought, feeling, behaviour and consequence.  Now let’s go over what you are going to do when you are in a high-risk situation.  What is your plan when you feel impulsive?  First, think of the word STOP. Stop, think, consider your options and plan!

For more information on impulse control and addiction please contact pathways plett rehab centre on 044 533 0330 or email us on info@pathwaysplettrehab.co.za