Worrying is often a spiral starting with a “what if” thought, such as

“what if” something terrible happens—then “what if” something else

awful follows that, and so on through a series of “what ifs.” The body

tightens up. The mind fills up with more and more thoughts about

mounting problems and looming catastrophes. You feel overwhelmed

by the fantasies. The solution to negative thoughts, according to Deanne Rapich is to do the following.

3 Steps to remove negative thoughts:

(1) Recognize you are being inundated by your own negative

imaginings. So, get a good grasp of those thoughts by writing brief

descriptions of your “what if” thoughts and fantasies so you can clearly

identify the dreaded thoughts and fears as soon as they occur. Many of

these ideas will be old habits of thought and foolish improbable notions

that have shaken you up and put you down for years. Go through the

worrisome “what if” negative thoughts you recorded and try to figure out your

basic fears or core beliefs. Often you are afraid that people will get

mad at you or judge you badly. Sometimes, we fear making stupid

mistakes or doing something that would shock or offend others.

 

(2) The second step is to develop a more reasonable, more

accurate, more positive expectation of what will happen. Ask yourself

if the feared “what if” event occurred, what would really happen after

that? Question your extreme predictions, for example, that others

might not like something you do but everybody will not hate you…and

those who get upset will not stay bent out of shape forever. Ask

yourself what are the chances you could avoid making the mistakes

you worry about and/or learn some new skills or a different approach?

Now you can replace the exaggerated awful idea about what will

happen in your negative thoughts with a more accurate, less worrisome expectation. At this

point, you are prepared to quickly attack the “what if” thought the

next time it occurs.

 

(3) The third step is, of course, to reinforce the new positive

beliefs by repeating the ideas over and over. You can build new habits

of thought. Almost certainly millions of people have learned, entirely

on their own, to avoid depressing worries, to put them out of mind.

 

Change is always possible, no matter where you may be or what you may be dealing with. Call Pathways for more information on how we can help.